Barroom jokes

  • Gettin' Drunk
    One day this guy was sitting at this bar in Chicago and looks over and sees this guy that looks exactly like him. He says to the guy, �Hey you look just like me!� The other man agrees and asks, ï…
  • At the Pub with Joe and His Wife
    Joe tells his wife he is heading out to the pub for a drink. His wife starts complaining that he's always at the pub and never takes her anywhere anymore. After hours of complaining, the husband a…
  • The Sailor and the Pirate
    A sailor and a pirate walk into a bar. They sit down next to each other, get to talking and their chat soon turns to their sea adventures. The sailor tells of his days fighting wars with the Navy, a…
  • Skeleton Crew
    A skeleton walks into a bar and asks for a beer and a mop!
  • Tequila Poem
    One Tequila... two Tequila... three tequila... FLOOR!
  • Redneck Toasts
    You know you're a redneck when at your wedding you toast with Budweiser.
  • Heinlich Maneveur
    Three guys were in a bar and they heard a woman choking. They decided she would be okay, and went on with their conversation. Pretty soon the woman started choking really bad, so the three guys…
  • I Loves You
    Do you believe in love at first sight? Or do I have to walk by again?
  • 5 Counterproductive Pick-Up Lines
    1) If you and I were squirrels, I could bust a nut in your hole. 2) How do you like your eggs: fried, scrambled or fertilized? 3) My love for you is like diarrhea; I just can't hold it in. 4)…
  • Martooni
    A lady walks into a bar and says,'' Barkeep, gimme a martooni.'' The bartender goes back and fixes her a martini. She downs it and says, ''Barkeep, gimme another martooni.'' So he goes back and fixes …
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