Business jokes

  • Human Resource Lingo
    "COMPETITIVE SALARY"  We remain competitive by paying less than our competitors. "JOIN OUR FAST-PACED COMPANY"  We have no time to train you. "CASUAL WORK ATMOSPHERE"  We don't p…
  • Saving Her Butt
    A man decided to paint the toilet while his wife was away. His wife came home sooner than he expected, used the toilet, and got the seat stuck to her rear. She was understandably distraught about th…
  • Fishing for a Week
    A man phones home from the office and tells his wife, "Something has just come up. I have the chance to go fishing for a week. It's the opportunity of a lifetime. We leave right away, so can you pack …
  • How To Sell Lawnmowers
        A young man just got a new job running the register at a store. The old-timer said he would teach him how to sell things. "Watch how I do it" he said to the new hire as a man came up to the cou…
  • Blonde Secretary's Memo to her Boss
    TO: Boss FROM: Blondie RE: Changing Calendars from Y2K I hope that I haven't misunderstood your instructions because, to be honest, none of this Y to K problem made much sense to me. At any rate, I…
  • Lost with Translation
    The American Dairy Association was so successful with its "Got Milk?" campaign, that it was decided to extend the ads to Mexico. Unfortunately, the Spanish translation was "Are you lactating?" Elec…
  • I Can Tell This Job Sucks Already
    Boss (to the new employee): We are very keen on cleanliness. Did you wipe your feet on the mat as you came in? New employee: Yes, sir. Boss: We are also keen on truthfulness. There is no mat.
  • Workplace Farting: Options Explored
    Whether the cause is a previous night of drinking or a big lunch, the outcome is the same: Farts. Seventy percent of the time, we can dispense freely. The other 30% of the time, such as at work, we …
  • Yo Mama's So Dumb... Job Application
    Yo' mama so dumb, when she filled out her job application and it said ‘sex,’ she wrote “not lately.”
  • Instant-Win Airbags!
        DETROIT--With third-quarter sales sluggish and its share of the domestic market down 11 percent since 1993, General Motors unveiled a new instant-win airbag contest Monday. The new airbags, whi…
1 2 3 4 5 7