Gross jokes
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I Don't Like My Brother
Cannibal Son: Mom, I don't like my brother anymore!
Cannibal Mother: You shut up and eat!
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Car Crash
A man and his girlfriend are driving down the highway. The man asks 'If I drive 100 mph, will you take off your clothes?' and she agrees. So the man drives 100 mph and his girlfriend strips. The…
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Bird-Brained in Helopisa
John went on vacation to Helopisa. As soon as he stepped outside, SPLAT!!! A big piece of bird shit fell on him. He asked the first person he saw where he could wash it off.
''No! No!,'' they s…
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Hot Dog
Guy walks into a restaurant. He sits down and this ugly waitress comes over. He then orders a hamburger with catsup and a hot dog. So five minutes later the waitress comes back with a plate with only…
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Maxi Pad to the Fart
What did the maxi-pad say to the fart?
You are the wind beneath my wings.
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Cuban Delicacy
A tourist has been visiting Cuba for a week. He is leaving the next day and he still hasn't tried the food.
He goes to a restaurant and sits down to order and then sees what the man next to him has…
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Vampires in a Bar
Three vampires walk into a bar. The first one says, ''I'll have a pint of blood.''
The second one says, ''I'll have one, too.''
The third one says, ''I'll have a pint of plasma.''
The bartender …
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A Letter To Tide
Dear Tide,
I have always used your product ever since my college days, because mom says it was the best. One weekend about a month ago, I was at my girlfriend's place, wearing my new white shirt…
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Gross Grandma
What is grosser than gross?
When you're kissing Grandma and she slips you the tongue.
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Definition of Agony
Agony: a one-armed man hanging off a cliff with itchy balls.