Jokes-o-matic^.com

If someone ever says, “What are you staring at?” Say “I don't know, give me a minute.”

You are so poor, you were kicking a coke bottle down the street and you said you were moving.

You so horny, last time you felt a breast was in a KFC bucket!

How tall are you? I didn't know they stacked shit that high!

You're so fat, Goodyear wanted to fly you over the Superbowl.

You're so fat, the last time you went on a bus, the ticket read ''Please allow up to 28 days for delivery''

You're so anal retentive, you could stick a piece of coal up there and have a diamond in a week!

You are so stupid that you took a ruler with you to bed to see how long you slept!

You're so poor, I walk in your front door and I'm in the backyard'

You're so fat that you bleed chocolate milk.