Jokes-o-matic^.com

You're so dumb yo put a quater in a parking meter and waited for a gumball to come out.

If gas were brains you wouldn't be able to power a toy car around a fly.

My wife asked me to take her to the zoo the other day. I said, “If you want people to see you they can come here and do it!”

Your Daddy's head so big he had to get baptized in the Pacific Ocean.

Scene: Suburban home, living room. Post-quarrel. Wife: You know, I was a fool when I married. Husband: Yes, dear. But I was in love and didn't notice.

Your face is so ugly, you look out the window and get arrested for mooning!

Tell me everything you know...I have a few seconds to waste.

You are so fat, I put a quarter up your butt and you spat out a Little Debbie cake.

You're so stupid that when police tell you you broke the speed limit, you offer to fix it.

You're so stupid that you have to turn on the light to see if it's dark.