Lawyer jokes
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Lawyer Brains
A doctor notices a sidewalk stand that says 'brains for sale.' He goes over to investigate and sees a sign that says 'Doctor brains $8.00 a pound and another sign that says Paramedic brains …
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Lawyers and Lightbulbs, Case #3
How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb?
Such number as may be deemed necessary to perform the stated task in a timely and efficient manner within the strictures of the following agreem…
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Plaster Lawyers
How many lawyers does it take to plaster a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw them.
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Duck, Duck, Lawyer
What can a goose do that a duck can't but a lawyer should?
Shove its bill up its ass!
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The State of Lawyers
Why does New Jersey have all the toxic waste dumps and California has all the lawyers?
Because New Jersey got first pick!!
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My Father, The Whorehouse Piano Player
A grade school teacher was asking students what their parents did for a living. �Tim, you're first,� she said. �What does your mother do all day?�
Tim stood up and proudly said, �She's a …
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Olllllld Lawyer
A lawyer died and arrived at the pearly gates. To his dismay, there were thousands of people ahead of him in line to see St. Peter. To his surprise, St. Peter left his desk at the gate and cam…
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It's Open Lawyer Season!
WASHINGTON STATE ATTORNEY SEASON AND BAG LIMITS
1. Any person with a valid Washington State hunting license may harvest attorneys.
2. Taking of attorneys with traps or deadfalls …
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Catfish and Lawyers
What's the difference between a catfish and a lawyer?
One's a slimy scum-sucking bottom-dwelling scavenger, the other is just a fish.
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Sharks and Lawyers
Why won't sharks attack lawyers?
Professional courtesy.